We went to visit my niece Amber on Wed., she had a lay over in Tucson. I am so glad that I had a good couple days. I got to visit with her and have a good time. When we got back home I've been in bed since. Friday I just could not wake up and when I did I was in such pain I had to go back to sleep. By last night though I was in such pain I could not sleep through it. I was up until late, when I did get back to sleep I had to wake up to take more pain pills, and I'm still awake and in pain now.
I just seem to hurt every where, with spots that are more painful. My right shoulder feels like a torn rotater cuff, but I know it's not. Of course my hands really hurt. makes it hard to type.
One day soon and I will not have to feel this way. Jehovah's promise is what keeps me going. I know that what he says will come to pass at it's appointed time. I am so very thankful for that. Without his holy spirit ti strengthen me I don't know how I could ever function.
I am blessed to be able to live with my daughter, son-in-law, and granddaughter. There are times that I can do nothing and the animals would go hungry as well as I would. Although I could lose a few pounds, but that's another story. I wish sometimes that my son's were more involved in my life, but I do have contact with one of them on a limited basis. I know that as soon as I say I really need some money for whatever he will not hear what I said and will need to get off the phone. Or if I talk about Jehovah again he will not be able to hear what I was saying and will need to get off the phone. Or if I ask him to see if he can bring or send my grandsons to see me. Oh well, Jehovah has blessed me with the children I need to help me during this time. So I am very thankful, even if I don't tell them enough sometimes, and complain about my limitations. I love them very much.
Saturday, September 3, 2011
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
Good Night
I had a good night for once. I had a good day yesterday, and then slept good last night. I woke with only my normal aches and pains at 4am. I am hopeful of having a fairly good day again. I just wish this heat would go down. But I know that as with all things during this time of the end of this system we all have to put up with some discomfort from the weather and other things affecting this old world. It is that I have learned that any extreme in the weather affects me.
My hands are getting so bad. They hurt all of the time now. But my knees are not to bad right now anyway. So I have quite a lot to be thankful for.
I hope to be up to cleaning the floors today. While the rumba pick up it does not mop. So I need to do that today.
I made carrot soup yesterday and I was the only one that liked it. I saw the recipe in a magazine at a doctors office. I thought it sounded good, but that is how it goes I guess. At least I was able to make dinner even if nobody liked it. Well it 5am and I need to get up and get started on my day.
My hands are getting so bad. They hurt all of the time now. But my knees are not to bad right now anyway. So I have quite a lot to be thankful for.
I hope to be up to cleaning the floors today. While the rumba pick up it does not mop. So I need to do that today.
I made carrot soup yesterday and I was the only one that liked it. I saw the recipe in a magazine at a doctors office. I thought it sounded good, but that is how it goes I guess. At least I was able to make dinner even if nobody liked it. Well it 5am and I need to get up and get started on my day.
Monday, August 29, 2011
Mother
I think that for a while after Mother left our father she kind of forgot that she had children. She was free to do things that she had never been able to do and did not have to answer to anyone. She was young, very pretty and excited to be able to breathe.
One problem she faced was that she had no education and was not able to get any other jobs but as a waitress, of cocktail waitress. Both took her away for long hours and introduced her to different men. Some of them were nice but others were like our father or worse. She did her best in those early years to make sure she had someone staying with us, but most of the time they were young girls like her that needed to get away from someone or something and just needed a place to stay. We all learned early on to take care of ourselves and for the most part each other.
I know that she had left our father twice but the first time she had gone back. I don't remember that first time. But I remember her telling about taking us all on a bus all the way from Calif. back to Texas. That must have been something having a small baby and three other kids five and under. But she managed to do it. Only thing was that she got no support for leaving her husband. She told me once that her Mother told her that she needed to go back and remember that as a wife she was to put up with what ever her husband did. I loved my Mama but I think she forgot that she had left her first husband because of he drinking and violent ways. Anyway she went back but the time I remember she did not go back and we had to learn a whole different way of life.
I don't know how long the had been separated but one time our father showed up at our house on a night he was not expected. My older sister went to the door, she was going to let him in even though he told her he had a gun and was going to shoot our Mother. I only know that I stopped her and yelled for Mother. I don't remember what happened after that but I remember being very scared, I know that if he had shot Mother he would have shot at least me. It never made since to me, our father had been seeing Maxine for a long time before Mother left him and was even living with her when he came over that night. But I guess it was one of those things we see so ofter in this old world, if he couldn't have her no one could.
After that I think is when we moved to the asparagus farm. Mother was working in the fields there and we got a house to live in as a part of her pay. We didn't have a fridge so we kept our milk and cold things in the window sill. I was the tester to see if the milk had gone bad because no one else would.
Then we got chicken pox and I remember having to have socks on my hands to keep from itching. We had to stay in a dark room while we were broke out. Our little brother got one blister on his cheek, while the rest of us had them all over.
I really don't have a lot of memories of those early years, I guess there was so much going on that I blocked most of them out. Mother never stayed in one place very long. But we stayed in Sacramento until after their divorce was final. By then our little brother had gone to live with our father and the three of us girls stayed with Mother. We went to visit our father sometimes and were to spend the summer with him. Mother continued to move around and we went with her.
We moved back to Texas for a while. But Mother left us with Mema on the farm while she went off to work and play. I loved the farm, but I think that being there made me more aware that everyone believed I was not my fathers.
Well I guess I have to go now as the cat will not let me type.
One problem she faced was that she had no education and was not able to get any other jobs but as a waitress, of cocktail waitress. Both took her away for long hours and introduced her to different men. Some of them were nice but others were like our father or worse. She did her best in those early years to make sure she had someone staying with us, but most of the time they were young girls like her that needed to get away from someone or something and just needed a place to stay. We all learned early on to take care of ourselves and for the most part each other.
I know that she had left our father twice but the first time she had gone back. I don't remember that first time. But I remember her telling about taking us all on a bus all the way from Calif. back to Texas. That must have been something having a small baby and three other kids five and under. But she managed to do it. Only thing was that she got no support for leaving her husband. She told me once that her Mother told her that she needed to go back and remember that as a wife she was to put up with what ever her husband did. I loved my Mama but I think she forgot that she had left her first husband because of he drinking and violent ways. Anyway she went back but the time I remember she did not go back and we had to learn a whole different way of life.
I don't know how long the had been separated but one time our father showed up at our house on a night he was not expected. My older sister went to the door, she was going to let him in even though he told her he had a gun and was going to shoot our Mother. I only know that I stopped her and yelled for Mother. I don't remember what happened after that but I remember being very scared, I know that if he had shot Mother he would have shot at least me. It never made since to me, our father had been seeing Maxine for a long time before Mother left him and was even living with her when he came over that night. But I guess it was one of those things we see so ofter in this old world, if he couldn't have her no one could.
After that I think is when we moved to the asparagus farm. Mother was working in the fields there and we got a house to live in as a part of her pay. We didn't have a fridge so we kept our milk and cold things in the window sill. I was the tester to see if the milk had gone bad because no one else would.
Then we got chicken pox and I remember having to have socks on my hands to keep from itching. We had to stay in a dark room while we were broke out. Our little brother got one blister on his cheek, while the rest of us had them all over.
I really don't have a lot of memories of those early years, I guess there was so much going on that I blocked most of them out. Mother never stayed in one place very long. But we stayed in Sacramento until after their divorce was final. By then our little brother had gone to live with our father and the three of us girls stayed with Mother. We went to visit our father sometimes and were to spend the summer with him. Mother continued to move around and we went with her.
We moved back to Texas for a while. But Mother left us with Mema on the farm while she went off to work and play. I loved the farm, but I think that being there made me more aware that everyone believed I was not my fathers.
Well I guess I have to go now as the cat will not let me type.
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